[I Was Naked]
When I Wrote ThisLive from Hollywood
2007-01-29
The walking dead.I was first drawn to an article on TMZ as the once gamine Olsen twin MaryKate is in denial of her anorexia and claims "her hair is making her look skinny."
If that were true Crystal Gale would be invisible, and Rapunzel a fairy...oh never mind, not a good simile.
I can assure the reading public, that as a hairdresser of twenty plus years, and I have personally worn every hair shade and style out there, except the Dorothy Hamill, no coiffure is that flattering. Case in point Sasquatch. That is one hirsute dude yet to my estimation carries himself at about 240 lbs. But it looks good on him...sure, let me try that out, and I'm sent home from the office to shave. Hmmph.
I just don't understand who is telling these women to turn into Skeletors. It's not the gays, I've always found my voluptuous breasts have been a great decoy for them, no smart ass, not to hide behind or in, but when you have a large rack, those that aren't ready to crack the door, see me as a mask of their sexuality.
Is there some new personal trainer out there who has found a way to suck the life out of them in trade for their celebrity souls?
It has been my experience that guys like girls with curves. I'm not saying they all like my Rubenesque form, but I'm not complaining about my life, or holding myself up to be the standard. But these women used to be hot. Sela Ward, Terry Hatcher, Angelina Jolie and my god even Jenna Jameson is on this link starting to show bone, and not the good kind in her hand, mouth or any other orifice. It's a sad day when porn stars go pop. As in lollipop. Big Head, Big Hair, stickfigure body. I'm telling you to view the pics, and decide for yourself.
I'm not naive and I know some of them are sporting the heroin chic physique. Duh Nicole Ritchie is in the pics as well. But what gym is going to allow their members to continue to waste away, when they won't be able to use the equipment? I have this vision of Sela Ward walking into the gym, going over to the weight rack, picking up a couple of 5 pounders, turming to face the mirror, and beginning a slow lean to the side as she slowly falls, creeeaaaaaak..bumph.
I run across this with my friends children, but thank god they are wisening up to this image that is getting shoved down their throats from celebrities who won't swallow..uhm..ok Jenna, you're excused from that comment. I only hope that any man that insist on a woman looking like a bone bag, better have a full head of hair, no paunch and his manhood better be scraping the ground, and not when he is laying down.
Well my little rant is over. I'm going to go eat a cookie and watch my ass grow.
Click to view.
Lollipop Lollipop Celebrity Lollipop...
princess (2007-01-29)
I love your rant...too funny!
Spirited Minikin (2007-01-29)
Hilarious!
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