[I Was Naked]
When I Wrote ThisSix Flags Over Dukes Car Wash
2007-03-11
I guess in the great scope of things, if one was going to assign personification to inanimate objects, the carwash would be the amusment park for our cars. If you think about it..you wait in line, pay admission, roll onto the tracks and wait for the fun to begin. Then you're finished off with a nice hot bath, and a rub down with a soft cloth.
So today, because it hit a mean 51 degrees, and my convertible is just-plain-filthy from all the road salt and crap over the last month or so, I decided to go to the carwash. I only will go to Dukes, as it is complete power washing, nothing to screw up the finish. I hate those swirly lines from "brushless" car washes.
My first attempt driving there, netted a big fat nothing..the cars were lined up out to the street. So I kept heading west, and debated stopping at the adult store for my own personal little restock of 6 Flags Over My Bedroom, but as a friend pointed out..just how many toys did I need? Hmmph. So instead I swooped around and headed back up the highway.
This time, there was room for my car so I pulled in and prepared for the wait. There was at least 15 cars in front of me, so I ran my mouth on the phone and sang along to my Cd's with the window down...nope don't care who hears me. Sometimes when I'm out with the gf's we may pull beside cars in traffic, roof down, and serenade the cars around us. Fortunately..we can sing.
So I am waiting at least 20 minutes, and decided that since my car was so dirty, I better not put the clear coat on it, since I don't want to seal any grime in, I need at least two washes before I do that. So I went with the cheap $11.00 job.
It's never a good feeling when the attendant takes your debit card...then runs off with it. Hey...I saw him disappear then reappear several minutes later with fresh rolls of tape. Whew. I kidded with him about it, signed the receipt and with great anticipation waited my turn. I watched the attendants pre-wash the car in front of me, and I was noticing they were involved in a conversation, but how hard is it to rinse a car? They motioned me forward, still blah blah blahing, and as many times as I've been there, they still think they have to tell a woman..Neutral, no brakes, which I was already doing..the tracks started to roll, then I heard the guy on my left, behind me now yell OH MY GOD..and I'm looking around for the problem.
So I hit the first part of the ride..no water..Ok, I figure, they just forgot to key in the program. Maybe the little dude forgot when he changed the tape, but all you have to do is press a button. By this time my car is still rolling along the ride -whooohoo- following the car ahead of me which is getting the works. Then my car approaches and ..nothing. This continues through every station, and not that my car isn't appreciating the ride..but C'mon - twenty minutes in line..for nothing?
By the time I reached the end of the line, I'm looking in my rearview and notice, not one car is behind me. Uh oh. Approaching from the front is management. I've powered down my window and turned off my music, because surely that can't be the problem. It's almost the same feeling you get when Officer Friendly is approaching. You know you haven't done anything wrong..but..I'm making a joke about the lack of service and the Manager says "Back Up."
I repeated what he said, "back up?"
"Unless you feel like going around again and waiting, back up."
"Alrighty then."
So now my car is going in reverse on the tracks, like you're going backward through one of those rollercoasters. The tracks aren't really meant to go in reverse, and I hear another attendant yell to the other guy, " Yeah I saw that , I was going to ask her to put her brakes on and pop the roller back on the tracks."
I beg your pardon? You wanted me to use my 2007 Spyder Convertible as a power tool to fix and jump your rollers back in track? I think not.
So anyway, I'm all the way back at the beginning of the "ride" and they are extra careful to hose off my car again, and I'm debating throwing another 5 dollars at them for the clear coat, but decide against it. Now I just want out of there. So my little car finally gets its ride and wash, and as I make it to the end, they are waiting with towels in hand.
They take the time to dry my car, but as with any convertible they leak. So I'm cracking up as the guy keeps trying to dry my window, not realizing its inside. I waved him off and and laughed and reminded myself why I wait so long between car washes. But at least this one was worth the wait, as I got to go through twice.
Looking at the NOAA.gov I see its going to rain Tuesday.
Figures.
Hardcore_Pyro (2007-03-11)
2007 Spyder Convertible - Sweet!
Shatterbliss (2007-03-11)
Thats the most awesome thing I've ever read. Thanks. =D
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