[I Was Naked]
When I Wrote ThisMemories and Mammories
2008-01-22
To the tune of Memories
Mammories, like the corner of my thighs
Milky water colored mammories
Oh, the way they are.
Scattered stretch marks, looks like tires ran on mine
Marks that plagued one another
Oh, the way they are.
Can it be they were oh so supple then?
Or has time deepened every line
If we had the chance to grow them both again
Tell me, would we? Could we?
Mammories, may be bountiful, and yet
what's too much for a mouthful
they simply choose to reject.
So its the rapture,
we try to capture
At least they're not
Minature.
Oh, they way they are
Moo moo moo moo moo moo moooooo.
Copyright P.Wierman 1985 The Ground Round Tour
I found myself singing this song today after I had my first mammogram. I'm only 4 years overdue, and the only excuse I have for not going prior, was I kept losing the referral slip.
I'm not really worried, even though my sister is having some go round with pre cancerous cells, and her doctor is telling her that I'll have breast cancer. Thanks alot, and you have a little penis. I mean, its quite an assumption to make, not ever meeting me, and genetically if you saw my sister we definitely take after the other side of the family. Anyone who meets us, doesn't believe we are sisters, until you listen for the ever present undercurrent of sibling rivalry.
Be that as it may, I have to admit, that as large as the girls are, they don't gather any beauty points, smooshed between glass and pressed to the size of dinner plates. Kind of impressive if I say so myself, considering the technician was happy she could compress them to the maximum pressure they had on the dial.
Personally, they haven't had any attention in a while, so I was cracking jokes about at least taking me out to dinner first and telling me you love me. The receptionist who checked me in said she never met anyone as happy as me about getting a mammogram. It's not that I was happy,there are just a lot worse things in life. However, I do agree with the general theory that a man had to have invented the machine, as a simple MRI or Ultrasound can do the same thing. What if we check for ball cancer by squeezing their goods between the glass? All of a sudden, its not such a funny subject is it?
Sorry men, I can almost feel your pain, got you right where you live now didn't I?
The one good thing about a mammogram is that there is nothing to prepare for, besides no deodorant or powder. No big shaves, well unless you have hairy nipples, then I guess you may want to groom those, or at least apply some mustache wax to keep the hair tidy. Nipples aren't an issue, as they place small bandage like protectors that have a little metal nubbin to go on top of your nubbins to help center the xray. I forgot they were on me, until I went to put my bra back on and felt them, so I figured I got to keep them as a lovely parting gift. I'm not real sure what I am going to do with them, but I'll find something festive, if not crafty. I'm pretty sure a refrigerator magnet wouldn't stick, or I'd have a cool new accessory on my sweaters, as if I needed to draw any more attention to them.
Author3000 (2008-01-22)
That's a really neat poem.
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