[I Was Naked]
When I Wrote ThisMiami Ink and Me
2007-02-14
Anyone that knows me would find it hard to believe that I watch Miami Ink. As a matter of fact I even allow myself to have a crush on Ami James. That is one intriguing man, even if he doesn’t fit my criteria –bald and tattooed.
The simple premise of the show, people getting tattoos and the reason behind them, isn’t mind boggling, but it does touch your soul. Sure you see a lot of pain expressed through ink, as if they were wearing a badge of honor. It’s a different way of coping. Personally, I like to live and learn from my life, but for me, as long as long as someone lives in my mind, they are never truly gone and no needles are involved.
My sister has a tattoo- now I’ll be in trouble if she ever finds this blog; it’s her big rebellious conservative roll she plays in life. She wanted me to get a tattoo as well her daughter. The same one she has. The concept was fine; the end product wasn’t to my liking. Plus as I explained time and again, there really isn’t a flat plane on my body, and good lord, tattoos stretch and grow if your anatomy changes.
However, as I was watching tonight, they had a quick blurb about applying to be on the show.
Now in my imagination, they are going to get deluged with all kinds of heartbreaking stories, and the hot babes that want their 15 minutes of fame. Not me, I have it all worked out. I think I am going to do it just to see what kind of response I get. Knowing my luck they will read it and contact Comcast and make sure they block my access to TLC Tuesday nights at 10:00.
A lot of times, the cast is hanging outside on the sidewalk when it isn’t busy. I need to catch them when they are. The door open, bells tinkle against the glass as I approach the counter. In my hand will be a rolled up tube of tracing paper for the stencil. Normally whoever is manning the desk greets you and listens as you describe what you are looking for them to tattoo. They are pretty tired of the Koi fishes, florals, skulls, etc. I’m going to plop my tube down and as I unroll the stencil a full front and back picture of a size 8 nude woman is revealed. I’ll explain how I want the thin woman tattooed front and back on my body, so I can go to the cosmetic surgeon and get everything outside of the lines liposuctioned out.They may be stunned into silence, but I think they would be up for the challenge and it would put a smile on their face. I’d even bring extra ink. Of course if they didn’t want to do that I’d have a backup picture of a certain gentleman’s head tattooed on my ass so figuratively I’m always sitting on his face. You know who you are.
Well, that’s my idea for the ultimate tattoo and then some. I’ll let you know how it works out.
Elvenbeads (2007-03-08)
Hey this is awesome and I thought I was the only one watching that show. Nice to see more fans. If you do ever get the nerve, let us know. ~Blessed Be
The Bottle Washer (2007-02-14)
color it up and make it classy :)
scribbles (2007-02-14)
I have never seen this show but good luck to you.
Very funny about a tatoo on the behind. Good idea but then again, they would always be following you where ever you go! Watch your back.
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